So, when are you getting married?

Almost every person I meet these days wants to know when I am getting married, now that I am 29.  I don’t understand the obsession that Indians have with marriage.  Why should age be the sole criterion for getting married.  Why do events in life have to follow a predetermined sequence – you go to school, get a college degree, find a stable job, turn 25, and get married.

Is it that difficult for people to understand that some people are just not ready for the added responsibility and the long term commitment.  Or that someone is considering a radical career change which would be unthinkable if they were married.  Or that they just haven’t found someone they can spend the rest of their lives with.  I love the freedom that comes from being single; I love that I don’t have to consult with anyone before I make plans.

The fault does not lie entirely with the older generation.  I expect them to be concerned about my marital future because that was the kind of environment they were brought up in.  But what amazes me is people my age who come up to me with completely unsolicited advice about how they think it’s time for me to get married.  My question is, how do they know that it’s time for me to get married?  I have seen a lot of people get married because their families, or society thought that it was time for them to tie the knot.  Why can’t they learn to think for themselves and stand up for what they believe in.  Why can’t people for once, understand that age has nothing to do with marriage; that the right age to get married is when you are ready.

Not a day goes by, when I am not asked about my nuptial plans; and I have resigned myself to these enquiries.   But I have not stopped hoping for the day when people would stop worrying about my marriage.  I wouldn’t hold my breath though.  I am an Indian, and I know my people.

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6 Responses to “So, when are you getting married?”


  1. 1 Kunal April 1, 2009 at 00:59

    Anytime I talk to anybody who knows you, that person always has to ask me the same question – “When is Pallav getting married?”, “Has Pallav made up his mind or not?”, and variants of the same. For you it must be a lot worse.

    And you are right, these questions are never-ending, and the only way to stop them would be to tie the knot…

  2. 2 Pallav April 1, 2009 at 08:35

    So does this mean you are you joining the band wagon too and suggesting I get married? If it’s true, I will have to spam you!

  3. 3 Kunal April 1, 2009 at 12:25

    Nah, I am not joining the band-wagon. I was just letting you know the fastest way to stop the questions 🙂

    Anyway you know I am your biggest supporter 🙂

  4. 4 Gaurav April 7, 2009 at 01:18

    Totally Agree with you(pallav) on the topic. But tell me Charlie WHNE R U GETTING MARRIED ? :))

  5. 5 Niral June 30, 2009 at 10:58

    Amen! Amen! Amen!

  6. 6 Pallav June 30, 2009 at 11:03

    @ Niral: One person I can count on to agree with me on this one! Riding in the same boat on these uncertain seas…..


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